Crisis in Cosmology (Part 8)

HUGE METEOR CAPTURED ON SECURITY CAMERA EASTERN IOWA RAW FOOTAGE

In the sleepy town of North Liberty, Iowa, excitement has been caused by “a flaming green ball as bright as the sun” seen shooting across the sky. On Friday, December 27, 2013, Dan Lange, Assistant Streets Superintendent, discovered that a security camera at the public works facility on S. Front Street had captured the falling object. The International Business Times reports that the amazing object “has caused a flurry of excitement among UFO spotters.” But Steven Spangler, a professor of physics and astronomy at the University of Iowa, scoffed and said, “When you see something, these flashing lights in the sky, we call these meteors.” [1]

But perhaps the North Liberty event was caused by a collision between the “expanding universe” and its presumed shell. (Background: Crisis in Cosmology (Part 7), Ersjdamoo’s Blog entry of December 28, 2013.) A piece of the shell may have broken off and plummeted down to a small town in Iowa. Aristotle posited an “eggshell universe”, which fits in well with the “Big Bang” Theory (BBT). The BBT says that around 13.7 billion years ago the Universe was created by a huge explosion and has been expanding outwards ever since. But exactly what was the Universe expanding into? Since the Universe is the whole magilla, what could be left for it to expand into? It is here that the eggshell universe conception comes in handy: the Universe here would be expanding into whatever lies beyond the eggshell.

But what exactly lies beyond the eggshell? A hardy team, the Big Bangers, seeks to go where none have gone before, a la the crew of the USS Enterprise on Star Trek. These bold Big Bang adventurers journey far, to the “eggshell frontier”, where “expanding universe” confronts the Aristotelian shell. “Beam me far, beyond the shell,” says Captain Klump to Mr. Greenjeans. “But Captain,” implores Mr. Greenjeans, “How can we know what lies beyond the shell?”

However Captain Klump of the Big Bang explorers has been reading his Aristotle and is not without a vague idea of what lies beyond the eggshell frontier. Late into the night the Captain had lain reading in his bunk. “The primary body must move with a circular motion which is natural to it,” he read. This must mean the Universe moves in a circular motion! “Ah hah,” noted Captain Klump, “this, in other words, is the ‘geometrical curvature’ theory which now dictates observation.”

“The only other motion is the straight, which moves either away from or towards the center.”

Captain Klump and his crew of Big Bang explorers had moved away from the center, to the very limit of the eggshell frontier. “Yes,” recalled the Captain, “it is exactly as Aristotle says: ‘The body which moves in a circle must necessarily be finite in every respect.’ From this, we Big Bangers know that the primary body, because it moves in a circle, must be finite. Beyond that lies the eggshell frontier, where I shall boldly go where none have gone before!”

But what would there be beyond the shell, where none had gone before? Captain Klump had an idea of what, based on his studies of Aristotle. “There is no infinite body beyond the shell. Beyond the shell there is no body at all,” the Captain read from his notes.

Captain Klump of the Big Bang team knew that what we call “heaven” is otherwise the extreme circumference of the primary body. This extreme circumference kept expanding. What it expanded into was beyond the shell, a place which is no place, with neither void nor time. [2]

You may find this hard to understand. As author Hilton Ratcliffe wisely notes, “Even if we were to find what appeared to be some kind of natural, physical boundary condition, we must ask the question, ‘What lies beyond?’ It simply cannot, in my humble opinion, be nothing. If you’re having trouble grasping infinity, try conceptualising absolute nothingness!” [3]

Captain Klump was vaguely aware of such doubters as Hilton Ratcliffe, but paid them no heed. “Oh ye of little faith,” said the Captain as he stepped onto the transporter pod. “Beam me out, Mr. Greenjeans!”

And so Captain Klump of the Big Bang team went boldly to where none had gone before, beyond the eggshell frontier. What did he find? Was it heaven? Was it hell? We do not know. Captain Klump was never heard from again!

——- Sources ——-
[1] “Meteor-like UFO Lights Up Sky in American Midwest”, by Fiona Keating. International Business Times, December 29, 2013. http://www.ibtimes.co.uk/meteor-like-ufo-lights-sky-american-midwest-video-1430430
[2] On The Heavens (Book I), by Aristotle.
[3] The Static Universe, by Hilton Ratcliffe. Montreal: Apeiron, 2010. http://redshift.vif.com/

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About ersjdamoo

Editor of Conspiracy Nation, later renamed Melchizedek Communique. Close associate of the late Sherman H. Skolnick. Jack of all trades, master of none. Sagittarius, with Sagittarius rising. I'm not a bum, I'm a philosopher.
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One Response to Crisis in Cosmology (Part 8)

  1. Pingback: Crisis in Cosmology (Part 9) | Ersjdamoo's Blog

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