Kung-Fu McCain in Kiev

KungFuCain

Shaolin monk Kwai Chang Caine wandered the American west, searching for his half-brother Danny Caine. In China, Caine had murdered the emperor’s nephew, reminiscent of the biblical Cain’s murder of Abel. Kwai Chang Caine bore marks: tattoos on his inner forearms.

The marks borne by Kwai Chang Caine bring to mind the mark borne by the biblical Cain. (“And the Lord put a mark on Cain, lest any who came upon him should kill him.” Genesis 4: 15)

Kwai Chang Caine did eventually find his half-brother Danny Caine.  And, it has been learned, Danny Caine had a son, named John. Since he was the son of Caine, he was called “McCain”.

This son of Danny Caine, John McCain, has wandered far. In December 2013 McCain found himself in Ukraine. (Background: John McCain and the Holy Lance, Ersjdamoo’s Blog entry of January 27, 2014.)

Like his uncle Kwai Chang Caine, John McCain bears marks of Cain, received during his long imprisonment in the Orient. Also like his uncle Kwai, John McCain has a vaguely oriental appearance.

When Kwai Chang Caine wandered the American west in search of his half-brother Danny, local ne’er-do-wells used to ridicule and insult him:

Ne’er-do-wells: Har, har, har! Hey, Chinaman! What’s yer name!?

Kwai Chang Caine: I am Caine (Cain).

Right there, if they had paid heed, something important had been said: He is Cain. But the ne’er-do-wells did not “get it.”

But later, after the ne’er-do-wells had thoroughly insulted Kwai Chang Caine, they became too bold: they would start to push him around. Kwai Chang Caine would have a flashback, and recall former words: “If any one slays Cain (Caine), vengeance shall be taken on him sevenfold.” The physical intimidation qualified as an attempt to “slay Cain (Caine)” and fearful vengeance was extracted.

Like his uncle Kwai, John McCain escaped from the Orient bearing marks. Psychological marks inflicted during his captivity make John McCain truly a son of Cain (Caine).

In a plot twist, John McCain blames not his oriental captors for his ordeal, but the Russians who supplied them with weapons. These enabled his tormentors to proceed with their bedevilments. In the judgment of John McCain, his oriental captors were only the hired hands of the Russians. “Vengeance shall be taken on them sevenfold” is McCain’s grim purpose.

And so we have come full-circle: from the earliest beginning when Cain became a wanderer; to the days of wandering monk Kwai Chang Caine; and now to the fulfillment: John McCain. He has sought vengeance these many years, prodded on by his psychological marks. The ne’er-do-well Russians were laughing at the hapless John McCain: “Har, har, har! What’s yer name!?”

“I am McCain.”

He had wandered into the town of Kiev. There, the local gang called “Svoboda” befriended McCain. Kung-Fu McCain had spotted a fair lass, US Assistant Secretary of State Victoria Nuland, in Kiev’s main Svoboda site, where she was handing out buns and cookies. [1] Famished from his wanderings, McCain gratefully accepted nourishment. While relishing his humble food, McCain got to chatting with the Svoboda people. He learned there were some bad hombres tyrannizing the town.

Then the bad hombres themselves suddenly materialized while Kung-Fu McCain quietly chewed the buns and cookies the fair lass Victoria Nuland had provided. “Har, har, har!” they guffawed. “Hey, Chinaman! What’s yer name!?”

“I am McCain.”

“The European Union sucks,” they taunted McCain.

Little did they know, the “humble ‘Chinaman'” bore the marks of Cain! Cain is associated with the Babylonian god Marduk, who “polices the monsters.” Marduk has been given his authority by Annu, the chief Babylonian deity. [2] Cain/Marduk’s authority has been passed down to his descendants, including John McCain!

The bad hombres turned to fair lass Victoria Nuland and rudely proposed, “How about a little kiss, sweety?”

Kung-Fu McCain had a flashback, from his days at the secret school. “Remember this young horsefly,” said the kindly teacher who was blind and yet seemed as if he could see all. “Do not turn to the North. Do not turn to the South. Do not turn to the West. But turn to the East, and to the Angel that comes from thence.”

The Russians! Kung-Fu McCain felt his blood begin to boil. “I blame not the oriental captors for my ordeal, but the Russians who supplied them with weapons,” he recalled.

Turn to the East. In the Sefer Ha-Aggadah it is written that, “four thousand two hundred and ninety-one years after creation [Babylonian civilization], the world will be orphaned [death of God].” Then, in the years that follow, “some will be spent in the war of the great sea monsters; some in the war of Gog and Magog; and the remaining period will be the years of the Messiah’s reign.”

Turn to the East. Though “the sins which thou hast done, cannot be undone, yet neither shalt thou bee undone by them.” They “shall never meet thee; but as in the round frame of the World, the farthest West is East, where the West ends, the East begins, So in thee (who art a World too) thy West and thy East shall joyne…” [3]

“What’s he muttering about!?” barked the bad hombres at Kung-Fu McCain. They began to jostle and poke fingers into McCain!

“If anyone harms Cain vengeance shall be taken on him sevenfold,” said Kung-Fu McCain. These were the last words ever heard by the bad hombres.

(THE ABOVE IS A SATIRE AND IS NOT MEANT TO BE TAKEN LITERALLY.)

(Portions of the above first appeared at my old Conspiracy Nation web site on August 31, 2008 and September 4, 2008.)

——- Sources ——-
[1] “US’ Nuland treating Ukrainian protesters to cookies on Maidan”, voiceofrussia.com, December 11, 2013
[2] Rulers of Evil, by F. Tupper Saussy. HarperCollins, 2001
[3] Donne, John. “Preached On All-Saints Day”, 1640

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About ersjdamoo

Editor of Conspiracy Nation, later renamed Melchizedek Communique. Close associate of the late Sherman H. Skolnick. Jack of all trades, master of none. Sagittarius, with Sagittarius rising. I'm not a bum, I'm a philosopher.
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3 Responses to Kung-Fu McCain in Kiev

  1. Pingback: Sevenfold Vengeance of John McCain | Ersjdamoo's Blog

  2. Pingback: Snipers Deployed In Ukraine | Ersjdamoo's Blog

  3. Felix Tam says:

    It is funny 🙂

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