State Department versus the Ants

Ant Attack [NAKED JUNGLE]

The District Commissioner told Leiningen, “Unless they alter their course and there’s no reason why they should, they’ll reach your plantation in two days at the latest.”

But Leiningen scoffed. They were only ants! “Even a herd of saurians couldn’t drive me from this plantation of mine,” he told the District Commissioner.

The Brazilian official threw up lean and lanky arms and clawed the air with wildly distended fingers. “Leiningen!” he shouted. “You’re insane! They’re not creatures you can fight–they’re an elemental–an ‘act of God!’ Ten miles long, two miles wide–ants, nothing but ants!” [1]

In Europe, barely hopeful asylum seekers clung to a border fence that Hungarian agents closed just after midnight as European nations deployed police, soldiers and razor-wire in a bid to stem the torrent of refugees and migrants flowing across Europe. But the Hungarian crossing closed, reopened, then closed again in the middle of the night. [2] What was Hungary to do!? The “ants” were piling up in Hungary due to the shutting off of the “relief valve.” And so the Hungarian crossing closed, reopened, then closed again.

Didn’t these people know that “immigrants create jobs”? The venerable New York Times itself had already told the “xenophobic” Americans this, back in March of this very year! Where was New York Times now?? Why weren’t they lecturing the Europeans about this, as they had already lectured the Americans? (Background: Immigrants “Create Jobs” in Europe, Ersjdamoo’s Blog, September 6, 2015.)

“Oh wow, man, you Europeans, don’t be xenophobic. Immigrants create jobs.”

Back when Hillary Clinton was the U.S. Secretary of State, she had hoped to bring Woodstock Nation to Tunisia, Libya, Egypt, and Syria. It was the “Arab Spring,” you dig? Before too long, all would be peace and love, just like at Max Yasgur’s farm back in 1969! “By the time we got to Woodstock,” sang Hillary Clinton as she signed important papers at the U.S. State Department, “we were half a million strong. And everywhere was a song and a celebration.”

Surely Bashar Assad would sing along! “And I dreamed I saw the bomber death planes riding shotgun in the sky, turning into butterflies above our nation.”

But Bashar Assad, President of Syria, was too busy with his eye doctor work. “I have no time for this,” he told Hillary Clinton. “I have patients in need of help.”

Hillary Clinton didn’t like this. “Oh why don’t you just go? Why don’t you just pack your bags and leave Syria,” she told Bashar Assad.

But Bashar Assad paid no heed to Hillary Clinton, and kept on with his work.

Then it was that Hillary Clinton must have been given some “bad acid.” (It is known there was some “bad acid” (LSD) going around back in 1969 at the Woodstock Festival.) Hillary must have gone on a “bad trip”, because she began imagining things like “Bashar Assad in Cahoots with Cthulhu”, “Secret Vampire Cult of Bashar Assad”, and “Did Bashar Assad Kill JFK?” (Background: Iran-Contra in Syria, Ersjdamoo’s Blog, February 13, 2012.)

And so, probably due to the then-Secretary of State having “flashbacks” or something, Hillary helped reincarnate Iran-Contra “Freedom Fighters” in Syria. The secret war in Syria was called by DEBKAfile “a Western-Arab undercover exercise.” [3]

When the Syrian “Freedom Fighters” mutated into The Blob (ISIS, ISIL, or IS, the nomenclature keeps changing) and began sawing off people’s heads, the 1969 Woodstock Nation turned into the 1970 “Riot Fest” at Grant Park in Chicago. (Ersjdamoo was there!) The Monday concert on July 27, 1970, was supposed to have been a goodwill offering, but when Sly and the Family Stone were rumored to have cancelled their performance, the rock festival disintegrated into a riot that injured 162 people, including 126 police officers. Three young people were shot. Cars were overturned and set ablaze. Rioters rampaged through the Loop, the downtown area, breaking hundreds of windows and looting jewelry and department stores. [4] (Ersjdamoo and friends noticed the bad vibes and “split the scene” about 10 minutes before the riot erupted.)

So Hillary Clinton’s pothead dream of Woodstock Nation in Syria turned into a bad-acid “Riot Fest in Grant Park”. The hippies turned into a “Weather Underground” in Syria and began sawing off people’s heads. It was around this time that Hillary decided it was all a “bad scene” and so she split from the U.S. State Department. John Kerry was brought in to sweep up the mess.

But the mess had acquired a momentum of its own. Even John Kerry could not put the genie back in the bottle. Syria was devastated, and a swarm of refugees began pouring into Europe. Like a magnet, the inferno in Syria began to attract thither the armies of the world. They are to meet at Har-Megiddo for the final battle.

So what peaceful citizen wouldn’t want to escape from Har-Megiddo, otherwise known as Armageddon? At first, for showmanship, Europe put on a compassion act. They had love in their hearts for the refugees. That quickly changed though into Leinengen versus the Ants. Europe could not agree about who gets what share of the “ants” (refugees). Instead there began to be talk of “lethal force” and “rules of engagement” in the Mediterranean. We must “defend Hungary and Europe” and “protect our way of life,” said Hungarian Prime Minister Viktor Orban. [5]

Things had gone a long way from the Woodstock Nation which Hillary Clinton had fantasized. It was all a “bad trip” now. Someone had slipped Hillary some “bad acid” it seemed. The whole thing was like an eerie dream about return of the Moors and Europe is a stony land. (Background: Feels Like 666, Ersjdamoo’s Blog, September 5, 2015.)

(Portions of the above are satirical and not meant literally.)

——- Sources ——-
[1] “Leiningen versus the Ants”, by Carl Stephenson. http://www.classicshorts.com/stories/lvta.html
[2] “From west to east, Europe tightens borders as refugees scramble”, by Robert Samuels and Michael Birnbaum. Washington Post (online), September 14, 2015.
[3] “Iran-Contra in Syria”, Ersjdamoo’s Blog, February 13, 2012. https://ersjdamoo.wordpress.com/2012/02/13/iran-contra-in-syria/
[4] “1970 rock concert at Grant Park was a true riot fest”, by Stephan Benzkofer. Chicago Tribune (online), July 25, 2015.
[5] “The Latest: EU fails to agree plan to share 120,000 refugees”, Associated Press, September 15, 2015 02:25 GMT.

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About ersjdamoo

Editor of Conspiracy Nation, later renamed Melchizedek Communique. Close associate of the late Sherman H. Skolnick. Jack of all trades, master of none. Sagittarius, with Sagittarius rising. I'm not a bum, I'm a philosopher.
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