Vatican Needs Bowling Alley

The Big Lebowski – Jesus scene

In Vatican City, a 109-acre fiefdom nestled inside of Rome, Cardinal Paolo Sardi is considered to be the adversary of Cardinal Tarcisio Bertone. Others residing in the facsimile Duchy of Grand Fenwick include even the former pope, Benedict XVI. (Contrary to public impression, Benedict XVI is not living high up in the Alps somewhere, surrounded by St. Bernard dogs, but inside Vatican City.) Also cramped into Vatican City are Cardinal Gerhard Müller, defending Catholics from heresy as Prefect of the Congregation for the Doctrine of the Faith, and Cardinal Lorenzo Baldisseri, Secretary General of the Synod of Bishops. Of course the new Pope Francis makes his home in Vatican City as well, along with several others. [1]

Inside Vatican City, “The neighbors have been feuding,” reports Alexander Stille, writing for New Yorker magazine. “In this compacted world, close friendships, intense rivalries, clashing ambitions, and personal enmities all flourish.” [1]

Besides being weighted down by the burden of necessary pious outward seemings, there are endless bureaucracies to manage and not much fun to be had. So why not at least have a bowling alley in Vatican City?

It turns out that Pope John XXIII (reigned 1958 – 1963) did have a bowling alley installed. [2] But this is the last we hear of it, so it is presumed now to be dusty, unused, and full of cobwebs.

But the Vatican needs this bowling alley. In Vatican City, crowded together, are irritable old men who must spend their time either shuffling papers for bureaucracies or overindulging in fine dining. Where is the healthy exercise? Pope Benedict, now retired (or seeming to be), does use a walker each day to amble about. However the rest of the gang are all busy hatching plots against each other as they are more or less confined day and night within the walls of the 109 acre fiefdom. Nothing is heard about mandatory daily calisthenics, much less vigorous bowling competitions between the cardinals.

Pope Francis seems to carry the weight of the world on his shoulders. He seemed very sad to John Boehner when, after the pope gave his September 24th address to a joint session of the U.S. Congress, he begged the Speaker of the House, “Pray for me.” And no wonder Pope Francis said this: he knew full well that all to soon he’d be returning to the dreary confines of Vatican City, where too much sedentary lifestyle translates itself into internecine plots.

It is urged that the pope initiate daily bowling for himself and all cardinals of the fiefdom. This is the place to begin, not with grandiose earth-shaking projects impossible to fulfill.

The reviews of the Pope Francis “Blood Moon” tour of September 2015 will soon enough be pouring in. This reviewer compliments the use of the small Fiat automobile instead of the massive Pope-mobile. Beyond that, unfortunately, not much favorable can be said. In the world of show biz, the papal performance seemed staged. Something novel at this point is needed to enhance the act. Instead the traveling carnival was predictable, with the usual symbolisms and puppet fan club clappings. New vitality could be added to the act by Pope Francis becoming “the bowling pope.” At each stop on future tours, Francis could don a special bowling shirt and head to the lanes. An authentic touch would be to have the name of a sponsor, like “Chico’s Bail Bonds”, emblazoned across the back of the shirt. [3]

This reviewer had considered adding to the act something with balloons, perhaps Pope Francis twisting balloons into shapes of poodles and giraffes, but has rejected the idea as a bit overboard.

But more seriously, beyond outward enhancements such as “the bowling pope” and balloon tricks, substantial change of direction is needed. And I must fault the pope, whom I believe under his alter identity of Jorge Bergoglio is a good man, for all his world of maya (illusion) preoccupation with the material, such as “climate change” and income inequality. The people need faith most of all. Instead the pope focused on the material world and not the spiritual world.

Substantial change of direction is needed. How about revisiting the “Trinity God” concept? Here, to possibly assist the pope in the profundities, is a brief synopsis:

Live Science online (and other sources) reports that a female water snake in Missouri has given birth to a litter of baby snakes via parthenogenesis. Parthenogenesis is a type of asexual reproduction “in which the offspring (babies) are produced by females without genetic contribution of a male.” Live Science calls it “Virgin Birth.” [4] We have these days “artificial insemination” which also amounts to virgin birth. Further out are controversial reports of women being artificially inseminated by extra-terrestrial beings. In the long ago development of humans, we once were unicellular and birth occurred by means of a sort of cell division. (We were already human at that bygone time of cell division procreation. We later divided into male and female, as metaphorically told about in Genesis when “Eve” was created from “Adam’s rib.” This is why, for example, the males of our species still have rudimentary mammae, i.e., breasts.)

So the idea of Mary having given birth to Jesus through “immaculate conception” is not impossible. But who was the father? Christians say the father of Jesus was Jehovah, also known by other names. We all carry the “divine spark” within us, but Jesus was a special case in that He did not have a human father. Jesus therefore did not have the human inheritance of the father which the rest of us have. Jesus had only to struggle against the human inheritance of his mother, Mary.

“It is the Lord’s Human Essence which is called the ‘Son of man;’ which also, after the combats of the temptations, was united to His Divine Essence, so that it was itself also made Jehovah.” [5] The “son” was the human half, inherited from Mary. The “father” was the divine half.

As to His internal man the Lord was Jehovah Himself. Because the internal man or Jehovah led and instructed the external, as a father his son, therefore relatively to Jehovah Jesus is called, as to the external man, the “Son of God.” [6]

Much confusion had surrounded the “Son of God” conception. The Roman emperor Constantine finally decided to have done with it and ordered up “Trinity God” to be the law of the land. But “Trinity God” has helped cause a disconnect between “above” and “below” (heaven and earth). “To sound reason it is worse than nonsense to think that the one God procreated some Son from eternity and that God the Father together with the Son and the Holy Spirit, each of whom is individually God, together make one God.” (The Holy Spirit, the third part of the erroneous “Trinity God” conception, is the divine power which radiates from the Almighty and not some separate entity which is also the same entity, both at the same time.) [7]

The “Trinity God” conception ordered by Constantine has garbled transmission between heaven and earth. What are people to think, when they try to worship the Almighty? That there are three “gods” which nonetheless are one “god”? You can see how it would confuse people and make for a difficult connection. A variation introduced by Rome says, “Never mind all that, just worship the pope.” Yet how can the people reasonably worship a man known to suffer from jet lag? (See for example Father Guido Sarducci’s attempt to interview Pope John Paul II about jet lag, video clip included in the September 25, 2015 blog entry, Pope Overdose of the Blood Moon.)

——- Sources ——-
[1] “Holy Orders”, by Alexander Stille. The New Yorker magazine, September 14, 2015.
[2] “Inside the Vatican – The World’s Smallest Country”.
[3] “Chico’s Bail Bonds”. Acknowledgement to movie, “The Bad News Bears.”
[4] “No Boys Allowed: Snake Mom Has ‘Virgin Birth'”, by Elizabeth Palermo. Live Science (online), September 24, 2015.
[5] Arcana Coelestia, by Emanuel Swedenborg. Num. 1729.
[6] Arcana Coelestia, by Emanuel Swedenborg. Num. 1733.2.
[7] True Christianity, by Emanuel Swedenborg. West Chester, PA: Swedenborg Foundation, 2010. Volume 1, Chapter 2.


About ersjdamoo

Editor of Conspiracy Nation, later renamed Melchizedek Communique. Close associate of the late Sherman H. Skolnick. Jack of all trades, master of none. Sagittarius, with Sagittarius rising. I'm not a bum, I'm a philosopher.
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One Response to Vatican Needs Bowling Alley

  1. Joe Sexton says:

    The bowling alley was given to the Pope, who had the equipment installed at the North American College on the Via del Ginicolo. I attended that school in the 60s and spent many hours on those lanes.

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